Wingmen

I remember playing peek-a-boo with my baby boy and him sitting on my lap. That was followed by a round of “I’m soooo big!” where I would stretch out his arms wide when saying the long drawn out “soooo” part of the sentence. I was reminded of this time in my life at church tonight. It was odd because my son is now 16 years old and he is now as tall as me.

It’s funny how normal it is for us to want to feel big as children. Now that I am older I’m not feeling so big anymore. In fact, I’m feeling rather small and inadequate. We have six children and for the most part we look good on the outside, but on the inside I’m fumbling around with parenting a 16-year old. I’m having trouble remembering being sixteen. All I can remember is that I didn’t want to be like my parents, but I can no longer remember why.

I am once again reminded of 2 Corinthians 12:7-10 “A Thorn In My Flesh”

In this story Paul tells of having a thorn in his flesh. Bible scholars have debated as to whether or not this was a physical thorn, moral thorn or relational thorn. Paul doesn’t ever say. I think it’s a relational thorn. The beauty of the story is that Paul never explains it any further so I guess it doesn’t really matter. For some it may be a physical thorn like cancer or an illness you have been fighting. For others it may be a moral thorn - something you just can’t shake that makes you vulnerable. Maybe your like me and you have a relational thorn with a child or your marriage or maybe it’s your parents or a boss.

Paul describes the thorn in the flesh as “a messenger from satan to torment me-to keep me from exalting myself!” That sums it up for me. I’m not feeling soooo big tonight.

Like Paul I am pleading for the thorn to be removed. Help me to be a better father! Give me wisdom, strength and patience!

I want so much for my son to see me like Superman - but I am a bumbling idiot with him. In ways we are too much alike and in others we are miles apart. I am desperately trying to connect but I am stuck somewhere between parent, coach and counselor. I am inadequate for the task at hand.

God told Paul “My grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness.”

I am reminded tonight that the recognition of our inadequacy is the pre-condition of our receiving grace from God. God’s power is made perfect right in the middle of our weakness - NOT after it, but during it!

I am a man of weakness NOT a man of steel. The image of Jesus is not the image of Superman. Jesus was a man on the cross - broken. That IS where God’s power was perfected in His son. We are men of weakness not men of steel.

Paul says, “Therefore I am well content with weaknesses, with insults, with distress, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ’s sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.” I wish I was smart enough to say that!

God meets us where we are at but he doesn’t want us to stay there. Strength isn’t automatic. We must acknowledge our weakness to God then He can meet us at our point of need.

There are 3 areas that satan attacks us and that God will use for His glory if we are willing to acknowledge our weakness to Him.

1. That which seems un-redeemable becomes a trophy of His grace. In other words, our broken past redeemed becomes God’s trophy or glory. Our past failure, pain, shame and guilt can be redeemed. You are never so far away from God that He will not receive you.

2. That which seems impossible becomes possible. Maybe God wants to use you, but you believe your past disqualifies you. Or your present disqualifies you. Or your lack of resources disqualifies you. His power meets us at our need.

3. What seems un-lovable gets loved. Nobody knows our darkness and brokeness as well as we know it ourselves. Satan fills our minds with stinking thinking “I’m not worth loving.” God loves us beyond performance and self sufficiency.

I am placing my brokeness at Jesus feet tonight. I invite you to join me in doing the same.

I need to hear Jesus say, “I am bigger than your fear, your pain, your guilt, your inept parenting! I know how it makes you feel. I know what it is like to feel tormented, weak, small and inadequate.”

I need Jesus to tell me, “I’m soooo big!”